Scrumbag

As England eye up Ashton's successor, why didn't they hire Jake White in the first place?

Whatever the result today, this time next week Ashton will probably be gone, and blazer boy Jake White will be hot favourite to take over. But why the hell wasn't he appointed after the World Cup? Everybody knew Jake wanted it, and sadly everybody also knew England didn't really want Ashton, however harsh that may have been.

White steered South Africa to World Cup final victory over England last year and has been out of work since as Springbok rugby has fallen into farce without him. I assume White didn't get the job before because the RFU didn't have the balls to hire a foreign coach. Ridiculous considering they're quite accepting of foreign players wearing the white of England!

Having seen how well Wales have done with their foreigner surely now win / lose or mauled by Ireland, England are going to want one of their very own. If they do, the RFU could do a lot worse than talking to White...

South Africa take pity on Argentina-no-mates

The Six Nations is well and truly underway, the Tri-Nations will be smashing its way into our rugby lives this summer, and even Asia has set up its very own competition.  Meanwhile, Argentina sit alone in their bedroom with no-one to talk to, sending hopeful emails via Facebook and the like, yearning for someone - anyone - to love them.  It breaks your heart.

That is certainly the view that SARU have taken as they have invited the Argies out on a hot date in August to play a Test match to celebrate the 90th birthday of former President Mandela.  Los Pumas had better get their best underwear on and let the Saffers get to at least second base if they want a return date.

Does Brian Habana have a secret crush on Jonny Wilkinson?

Yesterday World Cup winner Bryan Habana (oddly seen here shooting someone / something) paid tribute to Jonny Wilkinson amidst all this Wilko bashing. The South African described him as one of the best players in the history of the game. Fine.

"Playing against Jonny is the most difficult task," he gushed. "The way he picks up an English team is unbelievable - I don't even think Dan Carter can do that for New Zealand. I have the most utmost respect, not only for him as a player. He is probably one of the best players that has graced the game of rugby and hopefully he will be able to grace it for the next couple of years. He has proved in the last couple of years he is probably one of the best the game has ever seen and you, as an opposition player, have to respect that fact."

All that's fine and comes at a great time to give Jonny a lift before France. However Brian didn't stop there.
"He is probably one of the most perfect people off the field," he continued like a giggly teenage girl. Did you get a lock of his hair after the World Cup final Brian?

England to lose to All Blacks in November

Get on the Twickers Ticket Line pronto, as its just been announced that England will play New Zealand in a Test match at Twickenham on November 29.

England's two other opponents in November will be Australia and South Africa, so that'll presumably be three defeats on the spin for 98 year old Brian Ashton's boys.

Oh dear...

Jake White will never coach again after being 'oofed out by the Springboks

Speaking at a book launch in sunny Namibia, the blazer lovin' White said, "I have received many offers to coach in other countries but I have turned them down because I strongly feel that it is tough to coach in a foreign country. You don't know when you are doing the right thing because of different cultural backgrounds. You simply don't know their culture and how they want things to be done."

To make matters worse White doesn't seem happy about his controversial South African successor Peter de Villiers. "I mean, how do you expect the coach to be successful if his appointment did not receive the full appointment of the entire board?" White scoffed, as the anti de Villiers brigade nodded / high fived each other. "It is definitely going to take a big struggle to convince the 50 per cent that does not want you. But it also depends on the support you are going to receive from the other half which okayed your appointment."

I'd love to hear from any Springboks fans out there on what you think about the current situation South African egg chasery finds itself in. Are you a Jake or Peter fan? Or... neither...

Percy Montgomery: That Hurt Bryan

Is Percy Montgomery any good, or will be prove to be once and for all, the Achilles heel of the Springboks team in this Rugby World Cup.  It seems Bryan Habana may suspect as much judging by the following tackle.  Plus - a special cameo for all the fans out there of New Zealand's number one ref.

Jake White - "Boks have psychological edge"

Following the mauling that England took at the hands of South Africa on the recent comedy tour, Boks coach Jake White has turned his vocal output chip to gloat and said, "We've won a Test series, scored over 100 points and got 15 tries in the process, some from structured play and some from broken play"

"I think it's going to definitely have a psychological impact going on to the World Cup."

Perhaps.  However, I'm not sure how much of an edge can be gained by beating a side that left 30 of its first and second-choice personnel at home, and those that were brought on tour spent more time pebble dashing the porcelain than smashing tackles bags on the field.  Added to that, not only were the Boks at home, a home advantage at 4,500 feet is a totally different gravy to Twickenham by the Thames.

In spite of all this England still managed to compete for periods, particularly the first half of the second test.  Ultimately they fell a long way short, but beating a fourth choice side at home should not be cause for such assured bleatings from the Saffers. [Image: Getty]

Does Brian Habana have a secret crush on Jonny Wilkinson?

Yesterday World Cup winner Bryan Habana (oddly seen here shooting someone / something) paid tribute to Jonny Wilkinson amidst all this Wilko bashing. The South African described him as one of the best players in the history of the game. Fine.

"Playing against Jonny is the most difficult task," he gushed. "The way he picks up an English team is unbelievable - I don't even think Dan Carter can do that for New Zealand. I have the most utmost respect, not only for him as a player. He is probably one of the best players that has graced the game of rugby and hopefully he will be able to grace it for the next couple of years. He has proved in the last couple of years he is probably one of the best the game has ever seen and you, as an opposition player, have to respect that fact."

All that's fine and comes at a great time to give Jonny a lift before France. However Brian didn't stop there.
"He is probably one of the most perfect people off the field," he continued like a giggly teenage girl. Did you get a lock of his hair after the World Cup final Brian?

England to lose to All Blacks in November

Get on the Twickers Ticket Line pronto, as its just been announced that England will play New Zealand in a Test match at Twickenham on November 29.

England's two other opponents in November will be Australia and South Africa, so that'll presumably be three defeats on the spin for 98 year old Brian Ashton's boys.

Oh dear...

Jake White will never coach again after being 'oofed out by the Springboks

Speaking at a book launch in sunny Namibia, the blazer lovin' White said, "I have received many offers to coach in other countries but I have turned them down because I strongly feel that it is tough to coach in a foreign country. You don't know when you are doing the right thing because of different cultural backgrounds. You simply don't know their culture and how they want things to be done."

To make matters worse White doesn't seem happy about his controversial South African successor Peter de Villiers. "I mean, how do you expect the coach to be successful if his appointment did not receive the full appointment of the entire board?" White scoffed, as the anti de Villiers brigade nodded / high fived each other. "It is definitely going to take a big struggle to convince the 50 per cent that does not want you. But it also depends on the support you are going to receive from the other half which okayed your appointment."

I'd love to hear from any Springboks fans out there on what you think about the current situation South African egg chasery finds itself in. Are you a Jake or Peter fan? Or... neither...

Percy Montgomery: That Hurt Bryan

Is Percy Montgomery any good, or will be prove to be once and for all, the Achilles heel of the Springboks team in this Rugby World Cup.  It seems Bryan Habana may suspect as much judging by the following tackle.  Plus - a special cameo for all the fans out there of New Zealand's number one ref.

Jake White - "Boks have psychological edge"

Following the mauling that England took at the hands of South Africa on the recent comedy tour, Boks coach Jake White has turned his vocal output chip to gloat and said, "We've won a Test series, scored over 100 points and got 15 tries in the process, some from structured play and some from broken play"

"I think it's going to definitely have a psychological impact going on to the World Cup."

Perhaps.  However, I'm not sure how much of an edge can be gained by beating a side that left 30 of its first and second-choice personnel at home, and those that were brought on tour spent more time pebble dashing the porcelain than smashing tackles bags on the field.  Added to that, not only were the Boks at home, a home advantage at 4,500 feet is a totally different gravy to Twickenham by the Thames.

In spite of all this England still managed to compete for periods, particularly the first half of the second test.  Ultimately they fell a long way short, but beating a fourth choice side at home should not be cause for such assured bleatings from the Saffers. [Image: Getty]