Scrumbag

Get your grubby hands on the Six Nations trophy...

What's shiny, welsh, has big ears and was recently pawed by Gavin Henson. No, no not Charlotte Church people, it's the Six Nations trophy. And do you know what, you can get your mits on the thing thanks to some nonsense the WRU are up to.

Yes, the Welsh Rugby Union has launched a new online service at www.wru.co.uk where "volunteers providing the existing and potential ‘unsung heroes’ of the game in Wales with all the information they may need to become tomorrow’s referees, coaches, stewards, ground staff or club helpers at all levels of rugby. In a bid to aid volunteer recruitment nationwide, the trophy will embark upon a two month tour throughout the summer giving the opportunity to any of the WRU’s member clubs to apply to host European Rugby’s top piece of silverware."

All clubs need to do to access the glittering prize held aloft by Wales Grand Slam Captain Ryan Jones just a few short weeks ago, is apply within the next 7 days (closing date is 5pm, 11th April 2008) through their club secretaries via an online form found at the volunteer’s section of the WRU’s website. Sounds complicated. It is. Click here for more info. You might need to print it off, scratch your head and give it a couple of reads.

Six Nations hero Mike Phillips out for the long haul with niggling knee knack...

Ospreys scrumhalf Mike Phillips was piggin' splendid in the Six Nations as he helped both his club and country win the Grand Slam. For my money he was without doubt one of the players of the tournament. Bad news then for Wales and 'spreys fans, as Phillips knee is buggered. He messed it to shreds during Ospreys' EDF Energy Cup mauling of Saracens last weekend.

"After his operation he'll be looking at a six month rehabilitation period, which means that hopefully we'll be seeing him back in action by October," Ospreys physiotherapist Chris Towers told the offical Osprey website.

There's all kinds of damage to the ligaments in his right knee, he's going to need (kneed?) a truck load of surgery and won't be returning for at very very least six months.

Strange man dresses as Gavin Henson's daughter, then gets on a bus and starts crying...

While we all know Gavin Henson travels by train (God, it must have been at least a week since we mentioned Henson using a choo-choo as a toilet on Scrumbag) but few knew his young daughter Ruby Henson travels by bus.

Here, a strange Welsh rugby fan (named Leeps) has "dressed as Ruby Henson, AKA Gav's daughter" and got on a bus. Quite why he did this, and then felt the need to tell the world about it via YouTube I really do not know. If anyone can provide answers please, please do...

Guinness Premiership to ban any future Shaun Edwards type people...

He's bald, he comes from rugby league, he's not Welsh, he's got a billion jobs, and he's not that popular amongst certain people. Ladies and gents... Mr Shaun Edwards!

Wasps and Wales fans should soak up the Edwards lovliness, as a beast like him will never be allowed to be created again. The Guinness Premiership clubs have drawn up a rule which will prevent any of their coaches taking a part-time job with a national side. Does this mean Edwards couldn't switch to England then?

Apparently the rule has been drawn up because Premier Rugby felt that, if a club coach were involved with a national team, from age-group side upwards, it would give them a potential advantage over rivals because they would be in a position to tap up players. Yada, yada, yada...

Could Brian Ashton replace Eddie O'Sullivan in Ireland?

Well Ashton's return to Ireland would be unlikely, but you can't help but hope. As I drop to my knees and pray, here's 10 things to know about Ireland coach Eddie O'Sullivan written in celebration of today's big Irish news...

1) He's just quit his job due to him being rubbish at it.

2) When he was head coach of Ireland Under-21s, he beat Clive Woodward's England Under-21s.

3) He achieved feck all since that heady day in 1996...

4) Well, aside from three triple crowns.

5) He nicked his job off of his former boss Warren Gatland.

6) The IRFU shouldn't have let him do it due to Gatland being much, much, better than him.

7) He was contracted until 2012, so he should get a payoff big enough to feed him in lobster tails until at least next Xmas.

8) He had it put in his contract that he could temporarily leave Ireland to coach the Lions. Mmmmwah ahah ha hah ha!

9) He hates brilliant Irishman Geordan Murphy, refuses to play him, hence he kept losing.

10) He looks like the unwanted love child of Glenn Hoddle and Neil Warnock.

England star Mike Tindall is arrested after going out drinking with The Queen's granddaughter. Hang on, I thought he had a "liver" injury?

Big bad baldy England star Mike Tindall has been nicked for drink-driving the morning after a boozy night out at the Cheltenham Racing Festival with horse faced horse fan Zara Phillips. Whoops.

Thames Valley Police confirmed that they arrested a sozzled 29-year-old Gloucestershire man on the M4 near Newbury in Berkshire at 10.55am on Saturday. The man was arrested on suspicion of drink-driving and bailed. The cops will not confirm reports that it was Tindall, who plays centre for Gloucester, who was arrested.

Tindall as not in the team for England's Six Nations win over the Irish due to an extremely nasty liver injury. Surely if you've got an injured liver you can go out on the piss? Either they've nicked the wrong man, or Tindall has been taking the piss out of his country?

Missing the Six Nations already? Why not give the European Nations Cup a crack?

So the Six Nations are finally over, and there's nothing of major international egg chasing to look forward to until the Lions tour. Or is there. Scrumbag reader Andy Young is urging everyone to get into the European Nations Cup (Six Nations B) where things are really hotting up...

Apparently (and I'm sorry for being so slow on this) Russia edged past Romania this weekend to set up a winner takes all title clash with Georgia (who, of course, almost overturned Ireland at the World Cup this summer).

You can find out more about it at the excellent Russian rugby blog - Siberian Light. Apparently a giant 3,000 fans turned out in Siberia to see Russia's victory and it seems as though the game has a real following in Russia.

PS Any suggestions that we've run this Russian based post as a lame excuse to publish a couple of pictures of Daniel Lloyd in a Russian hat are largely unfounded.

Oh, and due to a complaint from Llefenni here's Ryan Jones (sorry he's not naked Llefenni)...

Danny Cipriani is really f*cking sorry for f*cking up and f*cking saying f*ck on the BBC...

The problem live TV has compared to Scr*mbag is you can't get away with saying f*ck simply by f*cking sticking a f*cking * where the u should be. Which is why when new golden boy Danny Cupriani said f*ck d*ring Sat*rday's Six Nations coverage, many posh people spl*ttered their tea every f*cking where. They were f*rio*s.

But Danny is sorry. Have yo* got it in yo*r heart to forgive him? He did afterall drop seven goals out of seven attempts to record 18 points on his first start for England.

If yo* missed Danny's o*tb*rst, in his post-match interview, live on TV, he bl*rted out: “It was the f*cking one to eight who deserved the man of the match.”

Soon after he said: “Can I apologise for swearing on national television? I was too excited after the interview and I am very sorry for using the F-word. I had thought about the game in my head a million times and it was a dream to be there. I used to watch Iain Balshaw when I was 10 years old. Being out there playing with them was an honour for me and I should not have sworn afterwards.” Fucking right you shouldn't have!

Is Shaun Edwards set to dump victorious Wales for England's bunch of losers?

Presumably still sore from drinking his own weight in Brains, Shaun Edwards might have to face up to the decision of his life soon. Should he quit the Gatland revolution with Wales and go back to England to rescue the whites from the claws of Ashton?

His boss, Gatland has today admitted Wales would be powerless to stop Shaun Edwards leaving if England make him an offer he cannot refuse - he doesn't even have a written contract with the WRU! Who runs things over there? That is frankly ridiculous!

A champagne soaked Gatland roared today, “Shaun will make up his own mind. Losing him is not something I have really thought about. The RFU have certainly got the money to make that call but I know how much Shaun has enjoyed being a part of Wales’ success. He loves the big challenge and the big occasion and they don’t come any bigger than we’ve just experienced. We would love to keep him on board and we have an agreement that is based on friendship and mutual respect. You have to be able to trust the people you are working with. He’s got that here, so why would he want to leave that behind and go to work with England?"

Would you want Edwards any way? He is after all a rugby league star with a CV not traditionally fit to lead England. Let me know what you think...

Brian Moore, Will Carling and Ieuan Evans go to the pub to discuss today's huge Six Nations action...

Thanks to Telegraph TV (who knew they did more than papers) for this brilliant preview of today's games. Moore actually seems quite relaxed for once! But what's with all the coffee lads? You're in a pub, you're all retired! Have a Guinness for Christ's sake!

Strange man dresses as Gavin Henson's daughter, then gets on a bus and starts crying...

While we all know Gavin Henson travels by train (God, it must have been at least a week since we mentioned Henson using a choo-choo as a toilet on Scrumbag) but few knew his young daughter Ruby Henson travels by bus.

Here, a strange Welsh rugby fan (named Leeps) has "dressed as Ruby Henson, AKA Gav's daughter" and got on a bus. Quite why he did this, and then felt the need to tell the world about it via YouTube I really do not know. If anyone can provide answers please, please do...

Guinness Premiership to ban any future Shaun Edwards type people...

He's bald, he comes from rugby league, he's not Welsh, he's got a billion jobs, and he's not that popular amongst certain people. Ladies and gents... Mr Shaun Edwards!

Wasps and Wales fans should soak up the Edwards lovliness, as a beast like him will never be allowed to be created again. The Guinness Premiership clubs have drawn up a rule which will prevent any of their coaches taking a part-time job with a national side. Does this mean Edwards couldn't switch to England then?

Apparently the rule has been drawn up because Premier Rugby felt that, if a club coach were involved with a national team, from age-group side upwards, it would give them a potential advantage over rivals because they would be in a position to tap up players. Yada, yada, yada...

Could Brian Ashton replace Eddie O'Sullivan in Ireland?

Well Ashton's return to Ireland would be unlikely, but you can't help but hope. As I drop to my knees and pray, here's 10 things to know about Ireland coach Eddie O'Sullivan written in celebration of today's big Irish news...

1) He's just quit his job due to him being rubbish at it.

2) When he was head coach of Ireland Under-21s, he beat Clive Woodward's England Under-21s.

3) He achieved feck all since that heady day in 1996...

4) Well, aside from three triple crowns.

5) He nicked his job off of his former boss Warren Gatland.

6) The IRFU shouldn't have let him do it due to Gatland being much, much, better than him.

7) He was contracted until 2012, so he should get a payoff big enough to feed him in lobster tails until at least next Xmas.

8) He had it put in his contract that he could temporarily leave Ireland to coach the Lions. Mmmmwah ahah ha hah ha!

9) He hates brilliant Irishman Geordan Murphy, refuses to play him, hence he kept losing.

10) He looks like the unwanted love child of Glenn Hoddle and Neil Warnock.

England star Mike Tindall is arrested after going out drinking with The Queen's granddaughter. Hang on, I thought he had a "liver" injury?

Big bad baldy England star Mike Tindall has been nicked for drink-driving the morning after a boozy night out at the Cheltenham Racing Festival with horse faced horse fan Zara Phillips. Whoops.

Thames Valley Police confirmed that they arrested a sozzled 29-year-old Gloucestershire man on the M4 near Newbury in Berkshire at 10.55am on Saturday. The man was arrested on suspicion of drink-driving and bailed. The cops will not confirm reports that it was Tindall, who plays centre for Gloucester, who was arrested.

Tindall as not in the team for England's Six Nations win over the Irish due to an extremely nasty liver injury. Surely if you've got an injured liver you can go out on the piss? Either they've nicked the wrong man, or Tindall has been taking the piss out of his country?

Missing the Six Nations already? Why not give the European Nations Cup a crack?

So the Six Nations are finally over, and there's nothing of major international egg chasing to look forward to until the Lions tour. Or is there. Scrumbag reader Andy Young is urging everyone to get into the European Nations Cup (Six Nations B) where things are really hotting up...

Apparently (and I'm sorry for being so slow on this) Russia edged past Romania this weekend to set up a winner takes all title clash with Georgia (who, of course, almost overturned Ireland at the World Cup this summer).

You can find out more about it at the excellent Russian rugby blog - Siberian Light. Apparently a giant 3,000 fans turned out in Siberia to see Russia's victory and it seems as though the game has a real following in Russia.

PS Any suggestions that we've run this Russian based post as a lame excuse to publish a couple of pictures of Daniel Lloyd in a Russian hat are largely unfounded.

Oh, and due to a complaint from Llefenni here's Ryan Jones (sorry he's not naked Llefenni)...

Danny Cipriani is really f*cking sorry for f*cking up and f*cking saying f*ck on the BBC...

The problem live TV has compared to Scr*mbag is you can't get away with saying f*ck simply by f*cking sticking a f*cking * where the u should be. Which is why when new golden boy Danny Cupriani said f*ck d*ring Sat*rday's Six Nations coverage, many posh people spl*ttered their tea every f*cking where. They were f*rio*s.

But Danny is sorry. Have yo* got it in yo*r heart to forgive him? He did afterall drop seven goals out of seven attempts to record 18 points on his first start for England.

If yo* missed Danny's o*tb*rst, in his post-match interview, live on TV, he bl*rted out: “It was the f*cking one to eight who deserved the man of the match.”

Soon after he said: “Can I apologise for swearing on national television? I was too excited after the interview and I am very sorry for using the F-word. I had thought about the game in my head a million times and it was a dream to be there. I used to watch Iain Balshaw when I was 10 years old. Being out there playing with them was an honour for me and I should not have sworn afterwards.” Fucking right you shouldn't have!

Is Shaun Edwards set to dump victorious Wales for England's bunch of losers?

Presumably still sore from drinking his own weight in Brains, Shaun Edwards might have to face up to the decision of his life soon. Should he quit the Gatland revolution with Wales and go back to England to rescue the whites from the claws of Ashton?

His boss, Gatland has today admitted Wales would be powerless to stop Shaun Edwards leaving if England make him an offer he cannot refuse - he doesn't even have a written contract with the WRU! Who runs things over there? That is frankly ridiculous!

A champagne soaked Gatland roared today, “Shaun will make up his own mind. Losing him is not something I have really thought about. The RFU have certainly got the money to make that call but I know how much Shaun has enjoyed being a part of Wales’ success. He loves the big challenge and the big occasion and they don’t come any bigger than we’ve just experienced. We would love to keep him on board and we have an agreement that is based on friendship and mutual respect. You have to be able to trust the people you are working with. He’s got that here, so why would he want to leave that behind and go to work with England?"

Would you want Edwards any way? He is after all a rugby league star with a CV not traditionally fit to lead England. Let me know what you think...

Brian Moore, Will Carling and Ieuan Evans go to the pub to discuss today's huge Six Nations action...

Thanks to Telegraph TV (who knew they did more than papers) for this brilliant preview of today's games. Moore actually seems quite relaxed for once! But what's with all the coffee lads? You're in a pub, you're all retired! Have a Guinness for Christ's sake!

As England eye up Ashton's successor, why didn't they hire Jake White in the first place?

Whatever the result today, this time next week Ashton will probably be gone, and blazer boy Jake White will be hot favourite to take over. But why the hell wasn't he appointed after the World Cup? Everybody knew Jake wanted it, and sadly everybody also knew England didn't really want Ashton, however harsh that may have been.

White steered South Africa to World Cup final victory over England last year and has been out of work since as Springbok rugby has fallen into farce without him. I assume White didn't get the job before because the RFU didn't have the balls to hire a foreign coach. Ridiculous considering they're quite accepting of foreign players wearing the white of England!

Having seen how well Wales have done with their foreigner surely now win / lose or mauled by Ireland, England are going to want one of their very own. If they do, the RFU could do a lot worse than talking to White...

Danny Cipriani used to date a lingerie model who plays the drums like a gorilla and was once said to have been born a man- should Ashton drop him for it?

First drinking orange juice in a nightclub at midnight and now THIS?

Just as you thought Cirpiani was back on the straight and narrow after "orange juice gate" and "starring on MTV in his pants", this comes out. Apparently Danny used to date a stunning lingerie model Larissa Summers who according to a News of The World exclusive (seemingly a hoax report) used to be a bloke. To make matters worse you can see her playing the drums like a giant ape, which is very embarrassing for 94 year old Sir Brian of Ashton who isn't used to seeing such exciting things.

Oh dear. That's a disgrace! Drop him! Drop! Him! Everyone! Panic! P! A! N! I! C!