Scrumbag

Is Jonny Wilkinson on crack?

The answer to that is most probably no, but something must be muddling the fly-half legend's mind, as he's clearly off his head regarding how he saw England played yesterday.

Jonny Wilkinson described England's display against Italy as "fantastic", but it was anything but that. He's getting a truck load of praise on blogs and in papers this morning for his 1,000 points, and he certainly deserves it - but also, England's second second half fade in a week needs to be looked at.

"Italy are a great side," lied Jonny. "But the guys all chipped in, they were brilliant to a man. We were fantastic." No Jonny, you weren't.

Let me know what you think about England's performance and Jonny's comments. Am I being too harsh, or is Wilks on the loopy juice?

Apologies, but...

With the tournament decided by the impossible margin that's in it, and the Scrumbags both being affected by a dose of something headachey, I'm afraid that the Wales - England game will not be covered live here.  If you can possibly get to a telly, do so.  It should be a cracking game, but too hard to blog in light of recent events.  No trophy is at stake here, just two teams who HATE one another.  Should be enthralling.

LIVE BLOG: France vs Scotland Second Half

This is so delicately poised, thanks to Sean Lamont.  The Hammer of the French last year, could he have scored the try that puts France on the back foot?  The French need to expand this margin by 18 points.  They certainly can do it, and when the gap was 11 points there seemed little doubt that they'd make the ground up, potentially by half time.  But now?  Who knows?

41 mins:  Scotland have the ball and are just looking to push France back with driving forward play.  Paterson breaks the line and looks through, but is called back for a forward pass.  Was it off a French hand though? No, Sean Lamont's hand was knocked, but it was his pass.

42 mins:  Hines knocks on deliberately (apparently) and France go for the corner.  But Scotland turn them over near the line and Paterson clears, though not to touch.  La Marseillaise rings around the stadium.

45 mins:  Well done Rory Lawson.  Little kick ahead bobbles like a hand-grenade, and Marty picks it up only to be immediately panelled.  Around the fringes of the Scottish ruck there is some ground to be made.  Playing advantage, Chris Paterson knocks on.  But it's a French scrum.  James Hamilton on fo the injured Scott Murray.

49 mins:  While you get the feeling that France could score at any time, there's a sense that Scotland have it in them to make this game competitive, never mind to help Ireland's cause.

50 mins:  Score at any time?  Will now do?  After some formidable first-up tackling from those in blue, it comes back towards the left and David Marty goes over.  Beauxis adds the extras.

***FRANCE 27 SCOTLAND 14***  (Ireland +11)

53 mins:  Rory Lamont on to replace Parks.  Paterson moves to fly-half and the sub takes his place at number 15.  The new fly-half concedes a penalty for illegal handling.  France go to the corner and have a 5-metre   Which comes to nothing.

55 mins:  Heymans try for France after Scotland lose it in midfield.  It's a messy try, though, and France are bleeding every last drop out of their chances before putting them away.  Beauxis can't convert, though.

***FRANCE 32 SCOTLAND 14***  (Ireland +6)

60 mins:  That should do it, you'd assume.  With Sean Lamont sin-binned for being the brother of a player who made an illegal tackle (a truly bizarre situation).  If Beauxis lands this, France move ahead of Ireland for the first time.  And he does, and they do.

***FRANCE 39 SCOTLAND 14*** (France +1)

64 mins:  Lawson goes off, Cusiter on.  Come on - just one magical, maddening break could still knock the trophy from the French grasp.

67 mins:  Beauxis has a penalty chance, just to widen the gap.  He hits the post.  Six Nations debutant Nikki Walker finds a prodigious touch with his clearing kick.

70 mins:  Sean Lamont is back on.  A full complement of Scots.  Could they possibly still be the fly in the expensive, fashionable ointment?

72 mins:  Scotland have a penalty, but don't kick (and neither should they).  Could they make the line?  It looks fenced in right now.  Safe hands, lads, safe hands... Agh!  Turnover.

75 mins:  Scotland lineout inside French 22.  Cusiter secures ball off the loose throw.  Scotland pound the fringes again.  Penalty again.  Scotland pushing and pushing AND PUSHING.  It comes out wide... Euan Murray!  The tight-head prop scores a try for Scotland!  Paterson...off the post.

***FRANCE 39 SCOTLAND 19***  (Advantage:  Ireland +4!)

78 mins:  France need a try.  Of any sort.  A penalty is not enough.  Converted or unconverted, a try would be.

80 mins:  French 5 metre scrum, with time up.  Christ.

France go over.  But is it grounded correctly.  Ask the TMO.  You can't see it being grounded.  The TMO says it has been.  France have won the Six Nations by the narrowest of margins.  Well done to them, they came through in the clutch.  Elvis Vermeulen scored the winning try.  Heartbreaking.

LIVE BLOG: France vs Scotland

Call us Scrumbag McTavish for the next 80 minutes.  A decent performance here from Scotland could make it hard for the French to chip away that 24 point total they need.  Eight tries for Ireland means that France need to match that and stop Scotland from complicating matters.  This means they'll need to take chances, and if you take chances you leave gaps, and Scotland may just exploit those gaps.

Probably won't, though...  (sorry, pessimist pills)

1 min:  No French score.  So far, so good.

2 mins:  In fact, France haven't even touched the ball, and now they've infringed close to their posts.  Chris Paterson to resume normal service, one hopes...  Argh!  What have the Irish ever done to you, Chris?

4 mins:  France are bleeding penalties.  Line-out in a promising spot for Ecosse.  Heeeeeeeeaaaave!  Scotland just keeping it alive.  Crossfield kick from Parks... Nikki Walker catches it and marks his debut with a try.  Paterson makes the conversion.  Good boy,

***FRANCE 0 SCOTLAND 7***  (Advantage:  Ireland +31)

8 mins:  French penalty advantage.  Marty makes nothing of it, Beauxis will go for the posts.  Skrela would make this.

Beauxis does not.  Good boy.

11 mins:  Clerc dumped.  France keep the ball though, trying to open things up.  Then the forwards try to keep it narrow and just make ground, and a knock-on gives Scotland the scrum ball.

Incidentally, in my preview I said that John Beattie had had an excellent game here two years ago.  I got confused.  It was actually Jon Petrie.  Beattie has never played here before today.

16 mins:  Scottish scrum, but France get hold of the ball.  Mignoni knocks it on, back to Scottish scrum again.  Good push from France, penalty results.  Will Beauxis make the first dent in the Irish points advantage?

Yes.  Git.

***FRANCE 3 SCOTLAND 7***  (Advantage Ireland +28)

20 mins:  Scotland win lineout ball, Rory Lawson is looking confident in his first start.  Hasn't gifted the opposition a try yet, either.  Take THAT, Chris Cusiter.

22 mins:  Beauxis not having the best of games, a poor pass giving Scotland a territorial boost.  They're picking and driving within about 22 metres of the line.  But they knock it forward.  France scrum.

25 mins:  This suits Ireland.  France are probably having the upper hand, but they're losing.  If all the stats stay the same, Brian O'Driscoll will be lifting the Six Nations trophy.

27 mins:  First real French threat on the Scottish line.  Clerc's break, taken on by Poitrenaud.  He's tackled short.  Twice.  France run a penalty.  Betsen drives.  Short again.  But then, somehow, unseen, Harinordoquy has scored the try.  Beauxis adds two.

***FRANCE 10 SCOTLAND 7***  (Points Advantage:  Ireland +21)

31 mins:  Scotland scrum from a French knock-on.  France are going to push this.  Knowing that, Scotland keep it simple and secure it in midfield.  But then they knock it on.  Marty breaks.  Then Mignoni breaks, and offloads to Jauzion who goes over.  TMO wondering if it's been grounded.  I sincerely hope not.  Looks like it has been though.

He keeps looking at it though.  Bugger.  He's given it.

***FRANCE 17 SCOTLAND 7***  (Ireland +14)

34 mins:  The upper hand is a French one.  They're knocking on the door again, and have a penalty advantage.  Heroic tackling from Scotland, and it comes back for a French penalty.  Beauxis bangs over a simple one.

***FRANCE 20 SCOTLAND 7***  (Ireland +11)

37 mins:  Parks kicks the restart into touch, giving France a scrum on halfway.  Since that knock-on, Scotland haven't really had any kind of attack.  But now Lamont breaks, offloads to Paterson, and the tackler doesn't roll away.  Sean Lamont taps it and goes... all the way to the line.  Paterson for the extras... simple.

***FRANCE 20 SCOTLAND 14*** (Ireland +18)

HALF TIME.  40 minutes to fill an 18-point gap.

LIVE BLOG: Italy vs Ireland, Second Half

Half time then, and Ireland lead Italy by 20-12.  Three valuable tries, and they've moved ahead of France by four points on points difference.  They need to build on this, and they need to sort out their set-piece because, to be blunt, it's been piddle-poor so far.  If they can build a decent platform from which to attack the Italians, that normally doughty Azzurri defence has looked fairly unhinged, and the points are there to make France work.

41 mins:  Let's see how Eddie O'Sullivan's words have affected the Irish players.  Leamy takes the opening restart.  Back to O'Gara, bang, Italy lineout about halfway.

42 mins:  Ireland's first line-out of the new half as caught by Leamy, but the throw wasn't straight.  :0

44 mins:  Italy build some phases, and have a scrum advantage off Stringer's knock-on.  A scrum that they will take, after the attack goes septic.

45 mins:  Ramiro Pez has injured a shoulder, and Andrea Scanavaccia is on.  Italy have a two-on one off the scrum.  The one, Hickie, intercepts and hacks on.  He loses out to Bergamasco (who had a head start), and it's a Blue 22.

48 mins:  Italy cannot clear their lines.  Troncon hits it right to Brian O'Driscoll, who runs at the heart of the Italian midfield.  Italy offend, and Gordon D'Arcy takes it quickly to run at Italy.  It comes back to Dempsey, who powers over between the posts.  O'Gara makes the kick.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 27***

50 mins:  Ireland have now got an 11-point lead in the points difference stakes.  They have scored four tries, which takes them four ahead of les Bleus.  They will at least make France work for the title.  A break in sight of the Italian posts finds Captain Bod, who knocks on.

52 mins:  Ireland have all the momentum, they are running at their opponents every chance now.  The all-Leinster back line is clicking like a Spanish dance class, and Shane Horgan is put in by Dennis Hickie to score Ireland's fifth try.  O'Gara misses the additions.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 32***

53 mins:  Italy are showing a lack of discipline now.  As I said last week, when they're ahead and don't need to chase things, they're horrendous to beat.  But if they need points, they don't seem to know how to craft them.  Another penalty, O'Gara puts Ireland inside the Italian 22.  Oh dear me, Italy are at sixes and sevens.  Dennis Hickie scoots over and it's beginning to resemble a prize-fight between Lennox Lewis and Brian Dowling.  O'Gara scores the extras.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 39***

57 mins:  More than a quarter of the game still to go.  Ireland should, to all intents and purposes, have this wrapped up and now shoukd be looking to run the score up.  And what happens?  D'Arcy break, O'Driscoll supports then flips it back to his centre partner.  Peter Stringer follows up, an Italian hand knocks it loose, and Ronan O'Gara is haring towards the line.  He scores his fourth try of this tournament, and adds the extra two.

*** ITALY 12 IRELAND 46***

61 mins:  The gap between Ireland and France is now 30 points and seven tries.  It's now a distinct possibility for Ireland.  The bad news is for England, who at this rate will need to put a round 60 on Wales.  You'd have to say that's a tall order for Ashton's men.  Brian O'Driscoll has left the pitch, replaced by Andrew "David" Trimble. Looks like an ankle.  The injury, that is, not Trimble.

66 mins:  The commentators are talking of Ireland having a dry spell.  Damn straight, that's five minutes without a try.

68 mins:  Italian scrum goes to ground like a house of cards, built on butter, in an earthquake.  When reset, they can't get anything going and Ireland have the put-in.

71:  Shane Horgan goes offside, Italian penalty.  A kick over the top is defended by Stringer, but Jonathan Kaplan claims he carried it over.  Meanwhile, he hands out a lecture to Leamy and Bortolami, who were involved in a full and frank exchange of views.

75 mins:  That dry spell may be more relevant now.  De Marigny hits a crossfield kick, Bortolami unsurprisingly rises above Hickie, pulls it in and scores the try.  The conversion goes wide.

***ITALY 17 IRELAND 46***  (points advantage:  Ireland +25)

77 mins:  Hickie bursts clear, evades some tackles and doesn't need the support.  He scores out wide to take Ireland over 50 points, equal Brian O'Driscoll's Irish try record, restore the thirty-point ecart and erase the Bortolami score.  O'Gara misses his extras.  Again.  Had he made all his conversions, there's be 38 points' worth of buffer for Ireland.

***ITALY 17 IRELAND 51***

80 mins:  Last play:  Ireland keeping it alive with another try in mind.  Penalty after penalty.  Might want to pot a drop goal if there's space for it.  But it's turned over.  And back.  Ireland are running from all over, but Italy have a close-range penalty.  De Marigny goes over, but does he get it down?  Have Ireland cost themselves five points and a possible Six Nations by being too greedy?  Let's ask the TMO, but I say double movement.

Full Time:  The TMO disagrees, Scanavacca adds the conversion, and it's a final score of Italy 24 Ireland 51.  Twenty-three points ahead of France in that crucial column.  Now, to be told that you need to win by twenty-three points against a team who can play a bit ... I don't think Bernard Laporte will be uncorking the champagne just yet.  Come on Scotland!

LIVE BLOG: Italy vs. Ireland

Firstly, let me wish all of our Irish readers a Happy St. Patrick's Day. You'll be pleased to know my Irish and glad of it husband spent a large portion of our Scrumbag wages on whiskey and Guinness so he's well stocked for the evening, but not a drop shall pass our lips until this nitty little Six Nations is all wrapped up.

Calculators at the ready! And also, betting slips. For the first time I bet on the Cheltenham Gold Cup, and lost. My second ever bet is on Ireland to win the overall championship at odds of 13/8. So as if we at Scrumbag Towers didn't want an Irish victory enough already, now there's money in it!

First up on the list today is Italy vs. Ireland in Rome. Italy come into the game on the back of a narrow win. Ireland come into the game on the back of a narrow (and bloody awful to watch) win. Ireland are favourites, but this isn't just about winning, Ireland need a rout and to score as many tries as possible. Easy in previous seasons, this time out it'll take a big effect from the boys in green to secure the win, then we'll worry about the points difference. Right lads, let's get going... the live blog is below the cut, hit F5 or refresh every couple of minutes to see our updates. C'mon Ireland!

Kick off: After some jaunty anthems - God the Italian anthem is catchy - we're off. Ireland start. Gathered neatly by Italy. Cleared. Ireland lineout, but it's stolen. Cripes, hope that isn't a sign.

1 min: Italy clear it, get a good distance. Ireland lineout, make this one better fellas. Taken at the back and spins out to D'Arcy, Ireland pack out the blindside. Again it goes to the backs, probably a bit far out to be chucking it around. Italy have knicked it and chip ahead, but Hickie handles it. Ireland need to chill.

2 mins: Italian injury, but he's alright. Scrum down where the ball was kicked, just inside the Irish half. Hang on, no, the Italian guy isn't alright, he's being subbed. Scrum down again, Ireland ball. It falls apart, ref Jonathan Kaplan calls for the reset. The camera angle is too wide. Italy concede the free kick and drive into the Italian half. The ball eventually comes back to O'Gara who kicks into space, but Italy gather and kick to touch, gaining a good few yards.

4 mins: Ireland fumble the lineout again but O'Callaghan rescues it. Ireland spin it across the field, side to side, and Ireland have the penalty. The Italians are putting in some bloody big hits. Gordon D'Arcy gets up, still quite obviously feeling that tackle. Ouch, rather him than me. Ireland are going for the points, sensible, considering points are what matters. Get it, O'Gara...

*** ITALY 0 IRELAND 3 ***

7 mins: The restart goes Ireland's way and O'Gara clears to touch. Italian lineout. Tapped down and Italy take it up the middle, no room there, they go for the chip kick. The kick from Pez is far too long, giving Ireland the scrum on halfway. The Irish scrum is wheeled slightly but Stringer clears it. Going down the blindside again, the forwards getting some running in, but they're not gaining much. Whistle has gone, Italy have been pinged for climbing over the top. O'Gara for touch.

10 mins: Ireland win the lineout and have a go, but Wallace is up-ended quite beautifully. Ireland try the kick, which Italy take, and clear to touch. It's an Ireland lineout, again, not gathered cleanly. What the hell? Ireland are missing Paul O'Connell big style right now.

11 mins: Scrum down Italy. They take it through the central channels again, then have a go wide - there's space! Robertson does brilliantly and it's on the other side of the field now. Italy aren't far off now. The recycle well, spinning the ball from side to side. Now down the blindside, they're stopped, but the ball is still live. Italy try the central route again. It's still alive, back in the pocket for - THE DROP GOAL FROM PEZ.

*** ITALY 3 IRELAND 3 ***

14 mins:  A series of small, petty infringements, Ireland are playing as though the enormity of the occasion is getting to them.  Eventually, Pez has a penalty chance front and centre.  He makes it.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 3***

16 mins:  Fresh from the restart, Italy concede a scrum.  They seek to push, but offend, and it's free kick Ireland.  The ball is worked out wide, and Gordon D'Arcy breaks.  Feeds O'Driscoll, who offloads to Demspey, and it's try time!  O'Gara misses the convo, though.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 8***

19 mins:  Infringements are the order of the day.  Italy make some dangerous ground, but Stringer nicks the ball and Horgan feeds Wallace who has space to run.  But the pass is forward, blue scrum.

21 mins:  Ireland turn them over again.  Wallace makes ground, then Horgan is released in so much space.  Easterby is in support and scores the try!  Amazing game thus far.  O'Gara misses the extras again.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 13***

Technical difficulties ensue, and we miss ten minutes' worth of blogging during which Pez lands a penalty and a second drop goal.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 13***

33 mins:  As it stands, France have a three-point advantage over Ireland , but will need to beat Scotland to cash in on it.

35 mins:  Italy are making the Irish scrum work very hard for not much reward.  It is imperative for Ireland to get their lineout working in order to counter this.  Pez has a penalty opportunity, but just drifts it wide.

38 mins:  O'Driscoll turns the ball over, or at least forces a penalty.  It's a quick tap, and D'Arcy gets free in midfield.  Needs to beat de Marigny.  He does!  Now he needs to touch the ball down.  Go on!  YES!  And O'Gara adds the two, as well.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 20***

Liveblogageddon! Scrumbag goes mental

We're aware that we've been quiet this week, but don't worry, we've been keeping our powder dry for the big weekend that's ahead.  We've already previewed tomorrow's action and taken you by the hand through the permutations for this weekend.  Tomorrow we'll be blogging until our fingers bleed (Mr. Scrumbag is even delaying his St. Patrick's Day tincture until the final whistle blows in Cardiff) and on Sunday we'll be going through the reaction from those games.

Keep this site bookmarked, this weekend's going to be huge, and only Scrumbag will have that unique mix of jaded cynicism and wide-eyed optimism.  Until, oh... 3.20 at the latest.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: Wales vs England

By the time Eddie Butler has made his first playful barb at Brian Moore, their respective nations may already be playing in what is effectively a dead rubber.  England will be hoping that the first two games of this Super Saturday have either been close, or tremendous upsets, but should either of their rivals have posted a decent score, they'll be chasing a massive margin of victory against opponents who don't need to have been stung by a run of four straight Six Nations defeats to want to beat England.

Stung, though, they have been.  Last week's final-whistle controversy in Rome can only paper over a certain number of cracks, and there is more crack in Wales' rugby edifice than in "Whitney and Doherty:  The 2006 Chronicles".  The absence of certain key players (and Gavin Henson) has been mooted as a reason for Wales' hideous recent form, but in truth, the players who have played are talented enough.  Two short years ago, they were about to celebrate a Grand Slam.  This year, a whitewash awaits unless those players remember what they're capable of, and just get it done.  Gareth Thomas captains the Welsh, perhaps regretting his haste to get Mike Ruddock sacked, and hoping that he can win the battle of the veteran inside-centres with English captain Mike Catt.  Catt, for his part, will be hoping that the magic number is not far beyond the current 29.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: France vs Scotland

After the final whistle goes in Rome, attention turns to Paris, where France will know exactly what they have to do to  see off the challenge of Ireland and, in all likelihood, take England out of the running for the Six Nations Championship.  Bernard Laporte's men were anaemic in losing at Twickenham, with the home try line rarely threatened in that game.  Should Ireland win by a decent margin, France will need to at least approach that achievement against a Scotland side whose sole win (against Wales) is perhaps scant reward for a campaign in which they have played some decent rugby.

The French will have to do their magic without the fly-half who has brought some stability to their kicking game, David Skrela.  His Stade Francais team-mate Lionel Beauxis steps into the breach, while powerful back-rower Sebastien Chabal also misses out to the benefit of Imanol Harinordoquy.  Rumours that this is as a result of a potential player-name-Scrabble tie-breaker were entirely made up at time of going to press.  For Scotland, John Beattie returns to the scene of his man-of-the-match performance two years ago, a match in which Scotland were hugely unlucky to lose.  Given the right result in Rome, a nation to the West will be adding their voices to the many Scots hoping that Frank Hadden's men will build on that performance and last year's Murrayfield win over the French.  For France, the hope will be that their Jekyll and Hyde team are all wearing the sane trousers this week.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: Italy vs Ireland

The first contender for the title taking to the field will be Eddie O'Sullivan's Ireland.  They've blown hot and cold this season, winning comfortably if unimpressively in Wales, losing a heart-breaker to France, walloping England at Croke Park and, most recently, squeezing past Scotland in a barely-deserved win last Saturday.  The Stadio Flaminio, while not a fortress as such (ask France), is a tough place to go these days, and in a game Ireland simply cannot afford not to win they will not be handed anything on a plate.

The hosts are without the talismanic Mauro Bergamasco.  Flanker, centre, scorer of vital tries, Ireland will be glad he's banned for this one.  All the more so considering that Bergamasco popped up to score the winning try against Wales while filling in at outside-centre for the gifted Gonzalo Canale.  Canale's injury has not healed in time, and the aforementioned duo are replaced by Maurizio Zaffiri and Ezio Galon.  It won't make it easy for the Irish, but things would have been a lot tougher with particularly Bergamasco in the line-up.  His brother, Mirco, is fit and will play, and may well be the Italian danger man.

For Ireland, there is good news and bad.  Lock Paul O'Connell misses out with a broken thumb and is replaced by Mick O'Driscoll, a nuggety, tough forward who can also play in the back row.  Marcus Horan, though, seems to have come through this week's training safe and sound and will add his mobility from loose-head.  In the backs, it's same as it ever was, with the Leinster back five selected en bloc behind the Munster half-backs.  Ronan O'Gara has recovered from Scotland's cheeky asphyxiation tactic and may yet add to the three tries he has already scored this year, a personal Six Nations best from a player who is improving into arguably the Northern Hemisphere's most valuable outside half.

LIVE BLOG: France vs Scotland Second Half

This is so delicately poised, thanks to Sean Lamont.  The Hammer of the French last year, could he have scored the try that puts France on the back foot?  The French need to expand this margin by 18 points.  They certainly can do it, and when the gap was 11 points there seemed little doubt that they'd make the ground up, potentially by half time.  But now?  Who knows?

41 mins:  Scotland have the ball and are just looking to push France back with driving forward play.  Paterson breaks the line and looks through, but is called back for a forward pass.  Was it off a French hand though? No, Sean Lamont's hand was knocked, but it was his pass.

42 mins:  Hines knocks on deliberately (apparently) and France go for the corner.  But Scotland turn them over near the line and Paterson clears, though not to touch.  La Marseillaise rings around the stadium.

45 mins:  Well done Rory Lawson.  Little kick ahead bobbles like a hand-grenade, and Marty picks it up only to be immediately panelled.  Around the fringes of the Scottish ruck there is some ground to be made.  Playing advantage, Chris Paterson knocks on.  But it's a French scrum.  James Hamilton on fo the injured Scott Murray.

49 mins:  While you get the feeling that France could score at any time, there's a sense that Scotland have it in them to make this game competitive, never mind to help Ireland's cause.

50 mins:  Score at any time?  Will now do?  After some formidable first-up tackling from those in blue, it comes back towards the left and David Marty goes over.  Beauxis adds the extras.

***FRANCE 27 SCOTLAND 14***  (Ireland +11)

53 mins:  Rory Lamont on to replace Parks.  Paterson moves to fly-half and the sub takes his place at number 15.  The new fly-half concedes a penalty for illegal handling.  France go to the corner and have a 5-metre   Which comes to nothing.

55 mins:  Heymans try for France after Scotland lose it in midfield.  It's a messy try, though, and France are bleeding every last drop out of their chances before putting them away.  Beauxis can't convert, though.

***FRANCE 32 SCOTLAND 14***  (Ireland +6)

60 mins:  That should do it, you'd assume.  With Sean Lamont sin-binned for being the brother of a player who made an illegal tackle (a truly bizarre situation).  If Beauxis lands this, France move ahead of Ireland for the first time.  And he does, and they do.

***FRANCE 39 SCOTLAND 14*** (France +1)

64 mins:  Lawson goes off, Cusiter on.  Come on - just one magical, maddening break could still knock the trophy from the French grasp.

67 mins:  Beauxis has a penalty chance, just to widen the gap.  He hits the post.  Six Nations debutant Nikki Walker finds a prodigious touch with his clearing kick.

70 mins:  Sean Lamont is back on.  A full complement of Scots.  Could they possibly still be the fly in the expensive, fashionable ointment?

72 mins:  Scotland have a penalty, but don't kick (and neither should they).  Could they make the line?  It looks fenced in right now.  Safe hands, lads, safe hands... Agh!  Turnover.

75 mins:  Scotland lineout inside French 22.  Cusiter secures ball off the loose throw.  Scotland pound the fringes again.  Penalty again.  Scotland pushing and pushing AND PUSHING.  It comes out wide... Euan Murray!  The tight-head prop scores a try for Scotland!  Paterson...off the post.

***FRANCE 39 SCOTLAND 19***  (Advantage:  Ireland +4!)

78 mins:  France need a try.  Of any sort.  A penalty is not enough.  Converted or unconverted, a try would be.

80 mins:  French 5 metre scrum, with time up.  Christ.

France go over.  But is it grounded correctly.  Ask the TMO.  You can't see it being grounded.  The TMO says it has been.  France have won the Six Nations by the narrowest of margins.  Well done to them, they came through in the clutch.  Elvis Vermeulen scored the winning try.  Heartbreaking.

LIVE BLOG: France vs Scotland

Call us Scrumbag McTavish for the next 80 minutes.  A decent performance here from Scotland could make it hard for the French to chip away that 24 point total they need.  Eight tries for Ireland means that France need to match that and stop Scotland from complicating matters.  This means they'll need to take chances, and if you take chances you leave gaps, and Scotland may just exploit those gaps.

Probably won't, though...  (sorry, pessimist pills)

1 min:  No French score.  So far, so good.

2 mins:  In fact, France haven't even touched the ball, and now they've infringed close to their posts.  Chris Paterson to resume normal service, one hopes...  Argh!  What have the Irish ever done to you, Chris?

4 mins:  France are bleeding penalties.  Line-out in a promising spot for Ecosse.  Heeeeeeeeaaaave!  Scotland just keeping it alive.  Crossfield kick from Parks... Nikki Walker catches it and marks his debut with a try.  Paterson makes the conversion.  Good boy,

***FRANCE 0 SCOTLAND 7***  (Advantage:  Ireland +31)

8 mins:  French penalty advantage.  Marty makes nothing of it, Beauxis will go for the posts.  Skrela would make this.

Beauxis does not.  Good boy.

11 mins:  Clerc dumped.  France keep the ball though, trying to open things up.  Then the forwards try to keep it narrow and just make ground, and a knock-on gives Scotland the scrum ball.

Incidentally, in my preview I said that John Beattie had had an excellent game here two years ago.  I got confused.  It was actually Jon Petrie.  Beattie has never played here before today.

16 mins:  Scottish scrum, but France get hold of the ball.  Mignoni knocks it on, back to Scottish scrum again.  Good push from France, penalty results.  Will Beauxis make the first dent in the Irish points advantage?

Yes.  Git.

***FRANCE 3 SCOTLAND 7***  (Advantage Ireland +28)

20 mins:  Scotland win lineout ball, Rory Lawson is looking confident in his first start.  Hasn't gifted the opposition a try yet, either.  Take THAT, Chris Cusiter.

22 mins:  Beauxis not having the best of games, a poor pass giving Scotland a territorial boost.  They're picking and driving within about 22 metres of the line.  But they knock it forward.  France scrum.

25 mins:  This suits Ireland.  France are probably having the upper hand, but they're losing.  If all the stats stay the same, Brian O'Driscoll will be lifting the Six Nations trophy.

27 mins:  First real French threat on the Scottish line.  Clerc's break, taken on by Poitrenaud.  He's tackled short.  Twice.  France run a penalty.  Betsen drives.  Short again.  But then, somehow, unseen, Harinordoquy has scored the try.  Beauxis adds two.

***FRANCE 10 SCOTLAND 7***  (Points Advantage:  Ireland +21)

31 mins:  Scotland scrum from a French knock-on.  France are going to push this.  Knowing that, Scotland keep it simple and secure it in midfield.  But then they knock it on.  Marty breaks.  Then Mignoni breaks, and offloads to Jauzion who goes over.  TMO wondering if it's been grounded.  I sincerely hope not.  Looks like it has been though.

He keeps looking at it though.  Bugger.  He's given it.

***FRANCE 17 SCOTLAND 7***  (Ireland +14)

34 mins:  The upper hand is a French one.  They're knocking on the door again, and have a penalty advantage.  Heroic tackling from Scotland, and it comes back for a French penalty.  Beauxis bangs over a simple one.

***FRANCE 20 SCOTLAND 7***  (Ireland +11)

37 mins:  Parks kicks the restart into touch, giving France a scrum on halfway.  Since that knock-on, Scotland haven't really had any kind of attack.  But now Lamont breaks, offloads to Paterson, and the tackler doesn't roll away.  Sean Lamont taps it and goes... all the way to the line.  Paterson for the extras... simple.

***FRANCE 20 SCOTLAND 14*** (Ireland +18)

HALF TIME.  40 minutes to fill an 18-point gap.

LIVE BLOG: Italy vs Ireland, Second Half

Half time then, and Ireland lead Italy by 20-12.  Three valuable tries, and they've moved ahead of France by four points on points difference.  They need to build on this, and they need to sort out their set-piece because, to be blunt, it's been piddle-poor so far.  If they can build a decent platform from which to attack the Italians, that normally doughty Azzurri defence has looked fairly unhinged, and the points are there to make France work.

41 mins:  Let's see how Eddie O'Sullivan's words have affected the Irish players.  Leamy takes the opening restart.  Back to O'Gara, bang, Italy lineout about halfway.

42 mins:  Ireland's first line-out of the new half as caught by Leamy, but the throw wasn't straight.  :0

44 mins:  Italy build some phases, and have a scrum advantage off Stringer's knock-on.  A scrum that they will take, after the attack goes septic.

45 mins:  Ramiro Pez has injured a shoulder, and Andrea Scanavaccia is on.  Italy have a two-on one off the scrum.  The one, Hickie, intercepts and hacks on.  He loses out to Bergamasco (who had a head start), and it's a Blue 22.

48 mins:  Italy cannot clear their lines.  Troncon hits it right to Brian O'Driscoll, who runs at the heart of the Italian midfield.  Italy offend, and Gordon D'Arcy takes it quickly to run at Italy.  It comes back to Dempsey, who powers over between the posts.  O'Gara makes the kick.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 27***

50 mins:  Ireland have now got an 11-point lead in the points difference stakes.  They have scored four tries, which takes them four ahead of les Bleus.  They will at least make France work for the title.  A break in sight of the Italian posts finds Captain Bod, who knocks on.

52 mins:  Ireland have all the momentum, they are running at their opponents every chance now.  The all-Leinster back line is clicking like a Spanish dance class, and Shane Horgan is put in by Dennis Hickie to score Ireland's fifth try.  O'Gara misses the additions.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 32***

53 mins:  Italy are showing a lack of discipline now.  As I said last week, when they're ahead and don't need to chase things, they're horrendous to beat.  But if they need points, they don't seem to know how to craft them.  Another penalty, O'Gara puts Ireland inside the Italian 22.  Oh dear me, Italy are at sixes and sevens.  Dennis Hickie scoots over and it's beginning to resemble a prize-fight between Lennox Lewis and Brian Dowling.  O'Gara scores the extras.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 39***

57 mins:  More than a quarter of the game still to go.  Ireland should, to all intents and purposes, have this wrapped up and now shoukd be looking to run the score up.  And what happens?  D'Arcy break, O'Driscoll supports then flips it back to his centre partner.  Peter Stringer follows up, an Italian hand knocks it loose, and Ronan O'Gara is haring towards the line.  He scores his fourth try of this tournament, and adds the extra two.

*** ITALY 12 IRELAND 46***

61 mins:  The gap between Ireland and France is now 30 points and seven tries.  It's now a distinct possibility for Ireland.  The bad news is for England, who at this rate will need to put a round 60 on Wales.  You'd have to say that's a tall order for Ashton's men.  Brian O'Driscoll has left the pitch, replaced by Andrew "David" Trimble. Looks like an ankle.  The injury, that is, not Trimble.

66 mins:  The commentators are talking of Ireland having a dry spell.  Damn straight, that's five minutes without a try.

68 mins:  Italian scrum goes to ground like a house of cards, built on butter, in an earthquake.  When reset, they can't get anything going and Ireland have the put-in.

71:  Shane Horgan goes offside, Italian penalty.  A kick over the top is defended by Stringer, but Jonathan Kaplan claims he carried it over.  Meanwhile, he hands out a lecture to Leamy and Bortolami, who were involved in a full and frank exchange of views.

75 mins:  That dry spell may be more relevant now.  De Marigny hits a crossfield kick, Bortolami unsurprisingly rises above Hickie, pulls it in and scores the try.  The conversion goes wide.

***ITALY 17 IRELAND 46***  (points advantage:  Ireland +25)

77 mins:  Hickie bursts clear, evades some tackles and doesn't need the support.  He scores out wide to take Ireland over 50 points, equal Brian O'Driscoll's Irish try record, restore the thirty-point ecart and erase the Bortolami score.  O'Gara misses his extras.  Again.  Had he made all his conversions, there's be 38 points' worth of buffer for Ireland.

***ITALY 17 IRELAND 51***

80 mins:  Last play:  Ireland keeping it alive with another try in mind.  Penalty after penalty.  Might want to pot a drop goal if there's space for it.  But it's turned over.  And back.  Ireland are running from all over, but Italy have a close-range penalty.  De Marigny goes over, but does he get it down?  Have Ireland cost themselves five points and a possible Six Nations by being too greedy?  Let's ask the TMO, but I say double movement.

Full Time:  The TMO disagrees, Scanavacca adds the conversion, and it's a final score of Italy 24 Ireland 51.  Twenty-three points ahead of France in that crucial column.  Now, to be told that you need to win by twenty-three points against a team who can play a bit ... I don't think Bernard Laporte will be uncorking the champagne just yet.  Come on Scotland!

LIVE BLOG: Italy vs. Ireland

Firstly, let me wish all of our Irish readers a Happy St. Patrick's Day. You'll be pleased to know my Irish and glad of it husband spent a large portion of our Scrumbag wages on whiskey and Guinness so he's well stocked for the evening, but not a drop shall pass our lips until this nitty little Six Nations is all wrapped up.

Calculators at the ready! And also, betting slips. For the first time I bet on the Cheltenham Gold Cup, and lost. My second ever bet is on Ireland to win the overall championship at odds of 13/8. So as if we at Scrumbag Towers didn't want an Irish victory enough already, now there's money in it!

First up on the list today is Italy vs. Ireland in Rome. Italy come into the game on the back of a narrow win. Ireland come into the game on the back of a narrow (and bloody awful to watch) win. Ireland are favourites, but this isn't just about winning, Ireland need a rout and to score as many tries as possible. Easy in previous seasons, this time out it'll take a big effect from the boys in green to secure the win, then we'll worry about the points difference. Right lads, let's get going... the live blog is below the cut, hit F5 or refresh every couple of minutes to see our updates. C'mon Ireland!

Kick off: After some jaunty anthems - God the Italian anthem is catchy - we're off. Ireland start. Gathered neatly by Italy. Cleared. Ireland lineout, but it's stolen. Cripes, hope that isn't a sign.

1 min: Italy clear it, get a good distance. Ireland lineout, make this one better fellas. Taken at the back and spins out to D'Arcy, Ireland pack out the blindside. Again it goes to the backs, probably a bit far out to be chucking it around. Italy have knicked it and chip ahead, but Hickie handles it. Ireland need to chill.

2 mins: Italian injury, but he's alright. Scrum down where the ball was kicked, just inside the Irish half. Hang on, no, the Italian guy isn't alright, he's being subbed. Scrum down again, Ireland ball. It falls apart, ref Jonathan Kaplan calls for the reset. The camera angle is too wide. Italy concede the free kick and drive into the Italian half. The ball eventually comes back to O'Gara who kicks into space, but Italy gather and kick to touch, gaining a good few yards.

4 mins: Ireland fumble the lineout again but O'Callaghan rescues it. Ireland spin it across the field, side to side, and Ireland have the penalty. The Italians are putting in some bloody big hits. Gordon D'Arcy gets up, still quite obviously feeling that tackle. Ouch, rather him than me. Ireland are going for the points, sensible, considering points are what matters. Get it, O'Gara...

*** ITALY 0 IRELAND 3 ***

7 mins: The restart goes Ireland's way and O'Gara clears to touch. Italian lineout. Tapped down and Italy take it up the middle, no room there, they go for the chip kick. The kick from Pez is far too long, giving Ireland the scrum on halfway. The Irish scrum is wheeled slightly but Stringer clears it. Going down the blindside again, the forwards getting some running in, but they're not gaining much. Whistle has gone, Italy have been pinged for climbing over the top. O'Gara for touch.

10 mins: Ireland win the lineout and have a go, but Wallace is up-ended quite beautifully. Ireland try the kick, which Italy take, and clear to touch. It's an Ireland lineout, again, not gathered cleanly. What the hell? Ireland are missing Paul O'Connell big style right now.

11 mins: Scrum down Italy. They take it through the central channels again, then have a go wide - there's space! Robertson does brilliantly and it's on the other side of the field now. Italy aren't far off now. The recycle well, spinning the ball from side to side. Now down the blindside, they're stopped, but the ball is still live. Italy try the central route again. It's still alive, back in the pocket for - THE DROP GOAL FROM PEZ.

*** ITALY 3 IRELAND 3 ***

14 mins:  A series of small, petty infringements, Ireland are playing as though the enormity of the occasion is getting to them.  Eventually, Pez has a penalty chance front and centre.  He makes it.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 3***

16 mins:  Fresh from the restart, Italy concede a scrum.  They seek to push, but offend, and it's free kick Ireland.  The ball is worked out wide, and Gordon D'Arcy breaks.  Feeds O'Driscoll, who offloads to Demspey, and it's try time!  O'Gara misses the convo, though.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 8***

19 mins:  Infringements are the order of the day.  Italy make some dangerous ground, but Stringer nicks the ball and Horgan feeds Wallace who has space to run.  But the pass is forward, blue scrum.

21 mins:  Ireland turn them over again.  Wallace makes ground, then Horgan is released in so much space.  Easterby is in support and scores the try!  Amazing game thus far.  O'Gara misses the extras again.

***ITALY 6 IRELAND 13***

Technical difficulties ensue, and we miss ten minutes' worth of blogging during which Pez lands a penalty and a second drop goal.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 13***

33 mins:  As it stands, France have a three-point advantage over Ireland , but will need to beat Scotland to cash in on it.

35 mins:  Italy are making the Irish scrum work very hard for not much reward.  It is imperative for Ireland to get their lineout working in order to counter this.  Pez has a penalty opportunity, but just drifts it wide.

38 mins:  O'Driscoll turns the ball over, or at least forces a penalty.  It's a quick tap, and D'Arcy gets free in midfield.  Needs to beat de Marigny.  He does!  Now he needs to touch the ball down.  Go on!  YES!  And O'Gara adds the two, as well.

***ITALY 12 IRELAND 20***

Liveblogageddon! Scrumbag goes mental

We're aware that we've been quiet this week, but don't worry, we've been keeping our powder dry for the big weekend that's ahead.  We've already previewed tomorrow's action and taken you by the hand through the permutations for this weekend.  Tomorrow we'll be blogging until our fingers bleed (Mr. Scrumbag is even delaying his St. Patrick's Day tincture until the final whistle blows in Cardiff) and on Sunday we'll be going through the reaction from those games.

Keep this site bookmarked, this weekend's going to be huge, and only Scrumbag will have that unique mix of jaded cynicism and wide-eyed optimism.  Until, oh... 3.20 at the latest.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: Wales vs England

By the time Eddie Butler has made his first playful barb at Brian Moore, their respective nations may already be playing in what is effectively a dead rubber.  England will be hoping that the first two games of this Super Saturday have either been close, or tremendous upsets, but should either of their rivals have posted a decent score, they'll be chasing a massive margin of victory against opponents who don't need to have been stung by a run of four straight Six Nations defeats to want to beat England.

Stung, though, they have been.  Last week's final-whistle controversy in Rome can only paper over a certain number of cracks, and there is more crack in Wales' rugby edifice than in "Whitney and Doherty:  The 2006 Chronicles".  The absence of certain key players (and Gavin Henson) has been mooted as a reason for Wales' hideous recent form, but in truth, the players who have played are talented enough.  Two short years ago, they were about to celebrate a Grand Slam.  This year, a whitewash awaits unless those players remember what they're capable of, and just get it done.  Gareth Thomas captains the Welsh, perhaps regretting his haste to get Mike Ruddock sacked, and hoping that he can win the battle of the veteran inside-centres with English captain Mike Catt.  Catt, for his part, will be hoping that the magic number is not far beyond the current 29.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: France vs Scotland

After the final whistle goes in Rome, attention turns to Paris, where France will know exactly what they have to do to  see off the challenge of Ireland and, in all likelihood, take England out of the running for the Six Nations Championship.  Bernard Laporte's men were anaemic in losing at Twickenham, with the home try line rarely threatened in that game.  Should Ireland win by a decent margin, France will need to at least approach that achievement against a Scotland side whose sole win (against Wales) is perhaps scant reward for a campaign in which they have played some decent rugby.

The French will have to do their magic without the fly-half who has brought some stability to their kicking game, David Skrela.  His Stade Francais team-mate Lionel Beauxis steps into the breach, while powerful back-rower Sebastien Chabal also misses out to the benefit of Imanol Harinordoquy.  Rumours that this is as a result of a potential player-name-Scrabble tie-breaker were entirely made up at time of going to press.  For Scotland, John Beattie returns to the scene of his man-of-the-match performance two years ago, a match in which Scotland were hugely unlucky to lose.  Given the right result in Rome, a nation to the West will be adding their voices to the many Scots hoping that Frank Hadden's men will build on that performance and last year's Murrayfield win over the French.  For France, the hope will be that their Jekyll and Hyde team are all wearing the sane trousers this week.

Six Nations Final Weekend Preview: Italy vs Ireland

The first contender for the title taking to the field will be Eddie O'Sullivan's Ireland.  They've blown hot and cold this season, winning comfortably if unimpressively in Wales, losing a heart-breaker to France, walloping England at Croke Park and, most recently, squeezing past Scotland in a barely-deserved win last Saturday.  The Stadio Flaminio, while not a fortress as such (ask France), is a tough place to go these days, and in a game Ireland simply cannot afford not to win they will not be handed anything on a plate.

The hosts are without the talismanic Mauro Bergamasco.  Flanker, centre, scorer of vital tries, Ireland will be glad he's banned for this one.  All the more so considering that Bergamasco popped up to score the winning try against Wales while filling in at outside-centre for the gifted Gonzalo Canale.  Canale's injury has not healed in time, and the aforementioned duo are replaced by Maurizio Zaffiri and Ezio Galon.  It won't make it easy for the Irish, but things would have been a lot tougher with particularly Bergamasco in the line-up.  His brother, Mirco, is fit and will play, and may well be the Italian danger man.

For Ireland, there is good news and bad.  Lock Paul O'Connell misses out with a broken thumb and is replaced by Mick O'Driscoll, a nuggety, tough forward who can also play in the back row.  Marcus Horan, though, seems to have come through this week's training safe and sound and will add his mobility from loose-head.  In the backs, it's same as it ever was, with the Leinster back five selected en bloc behind the Munster half-backs.  Ronan O'Gara has recovered from Scotland's cheeky asphyxiation tactic and may yet add to the three tries he has already scored this year, a personal Six Nations best from a player who is improving into arguably the Northern Hemisphere's most valuable outside half.

LIVE BLOG: England vs France Second Half

Mike Catt's England trail France by 12-9 at half time.  It's been open, it's been quite enjoyable, but no-one's managed to really take things by the scruff of the neck and win the game.  Sonia McLaughlin is telling us that Toby Flood has a bit of a dead leg and, though he will carry on, don't be shocked to see Shane Geraghty replace him before too long.  For France, Skrela has left the game and is replaced by Beauxis.

41 mins:  If he has a dead leg, then it's not a problem, because his kicking leg is very much alive.  Flood forces the French to turn and the clearing kick from Clerc doesn't find touch.  England can apply some pressure now.

42 mins:  England win a scrum and contest it perfectly, but then are forced back.  Catt kicks downfield.  France eventually get some decent ball and Clerc breaks, but ignores the support of Poitrenaud, allowing England to stymy things.

45 mins:  England win a French line-out inside the visitors' 22.  They try to drive a maul over, but it's held.  Ellis then tries to spin it to the backs, but Flood is scragged.  They've gone backwards again.  But then that man, Mike Catt outpaces Ibanez and plays in Toby Flood for the Falcon's first ever England try!  Yay!  Cmon England!  (That still feels weird)

***ENGLAND 16 FRANCE 12***

48 mins:  Chabal off, Harinordoquy on.

49 mins:  Betsen hits Catt, and ends up injuring himself.  Whoops!

52 mins:  Tom Rees plays the ball on the ground, Yachvili bangs over the penalty.

***ENGLAND 16 FRANCE 15***

54 mins:  Strettle sets off running for the line after a turnover.  But... it's called back, as Ellis is seen to have tackled Yachvili off the ball.  Silly sausage.

56 mins:  Rees tackles Clerc and wraps him up.  And it's a French scrum.  Why?

57 mins:  Mike Tindall goes offside.  Handing Yachvili a chance to regain the lead

59 mins:  Which he takes.

***ENGLAND 16 FRANCE 18***

The plan was clearly to give Flood about 20 minutes or until he could take no more, on comes Geraghty.

61 mins:  Jason Robinson breaks near the French line, but is stopped.  Then a delightful off-load by Catt, Lewsey is taken into touch.  But he'd released the ball, unbeknownst to the match officials.  The England backs are coming into this a bit more, as France concede possession and Mike Tindall kicks ahead.  But he doesn't have the legs to chase it.

64 mins:  So much happening here now.  Geraghty, Worsley, there goes Strettle... what a player this boy looks to be.  Fast, elusive and confident.  England stopped short, but one has to doubt the legality of their doing so.  No penalty try or sin-binning, but Geraghty scores his first points at this level to make it...

***ENGLAND 19 FRANCE 18***

67 mins:  England penalty from the restart, possession secured  and they drive at France.  But they offend and lose the ball after all that.  Beauxis kicks for touch, French lineout about 25 metres out.

70 mins:  Possession secured, maul goes about five metres.  Then it's released to the backs and again they do very little with it.  Poor execution by France, England ball.

72 mins:  Geraghty tears France apart down the middle, offloads about two metres short.  Catt can't haul it in, so bats it backwards and Mike Tindall takes it ... in for the try!  Geraghty adds the two, what a debut he's having.

***ENGLAND 26 FRANCE 18***

74 mins:  Betsen, of all people, spurns possession with a knock-on.

76 mins:  England have had 100 total phases of play.  France?  37.

78 mins:  Mike Catt off, Shaun Perry on.  Eh?  Looks like Ellis has gone to the wing, Matt Tait to the centre in Catt's place, and Perry to scrum-half.

80 mins:  Time up.  Isn't it?  Oh, England scrum.  Perry just chips into touch, and it's over, England have won!  Well deserved as well.  Newcomers Rees, Geraghty and Strettle played like veterans.  Veterans Catt and Corry played like men ten years younger.  And a three-way battle for the Six Nations title next week - could get tasty.  Join us for that a week hence.  Hope you enjoyed today's game.  I will say now, in an unironic, unbiased way, I certainly enjoyed it.

LIVE BLOG: England vs. France

Hello there. We're ten minutes from kick off in Le Crunch, England  vs. France. As an England fan I'd like to pretend that England have a chance here, and though there may be a slight chance of an upset, my gut tells me the French are going to win here. I predict a fierce contest for the first sixty minutes then the English resistant will break and France could run riot.

I'd love to be wrong, but only time will tell. On that front, here commences our last live blog of the weekend, ENGLAND VS. FRANCE live at Twickenham.

Pre-kick off amble: What exactly is Brian Ashton's aversion to false teeth? He's dreadfully lippy.

John Inverdale tells us that the biggest margin of defeat France have inflicted on England at Twickenham is eight points. Records may roll, I fear.

France run out. Go on one of you, trip, it'll be funny. Nope. Selfish sods.

Mike Catt runs out as England captain. *tear of pride*

French anthem. My husband, a fluent French speaker, is singing along. Nice. Thanks for your support, Paul.

Me: "Shut up!"
Paul: "Sorry, but it's catchy!"

Oh God, dirge time. God Save The Queen. Still, Mike Catt looks quite emotional. Bless. Land of Hope and Glory? We're getting as bad as the Irish with this anthem lark... can we play some rugby now, please?

Kick off: England to start. France gather. Punts it down field and David Strettle fumbles in, just as Eddie Butler says he's one of the bright stars for England. Oops. Still, he clears it well and France have a lineout in the French half. Chabal misses it. England spin it wide, but France turn it over and France take it up the centre channel. Skrela kicks for touch and gets it.

2 mins: Penalty France from the England lineout. It's quite far out but France are going for it. I like that, it shows that they don't think we're a complete joke (then they'd have gone for the lineout). Skrela kicking. Gets it.

*** ENGLAND 0 FRANCE 3 ***

4 mins: England restart. We play a bit of ping pong then France spin it wide. France are slowly gaining ground here, but England have turned it over. Flood goes for the chip kick and does well, gathering it. England have numbers on the blind side but unfortunately those numbers are forwards, so they take it into contact. England try it on the open side, but spill the ball in contact and France counter. They're steaming up the pitch and they've got men over - look out England! Then the whistle goes - phew! France knock on, England scrum.

6 mins: England win the scrum and Catt kicks, but misses touch. France bring it up but then it's turnover and England take it up the centre. Go down the blind, doing well, float pass to Robinson but he's brought down. They go the other way, but Skrela intercepts. Skrela is on the floor screaming. The replay suggests it is his ankle.

7 min. Stop clock. It looks bloody nasty but I don't think it's broken, the physio is moving it a lot. I think he'll be off, but... oh hang on, he's up, so definitely not broken, and he's trying to rejoin the line. He seems okay. That looked a lot worse than him being able to play on suggests.

England penalty: *** ENGLAND 3 FRANCE 3 ***

Sorry guys, I missed what that was for, I was focusing on Skrela. The same man restarts for France.

8 mins: England have possession. England spin it wide to Catt who takes it to contact and Tindall recycles it. Jason Robinson has to pause to collect the pass and it's all a bit flat. England recycle again and now we're going backwards. Down the blind side this time, but the French tackling is fierce. Strettle does well and the forwards take it out. To the backs again, and Mike Catt drops it.

10 mins: France scrum. Harry Ellis is bloody amazing and England scrum. Real nuisance work from Ellis there; worked a treat. The French prop nearest the TV isn't bound, but the ref doesn't see. Lewsey breaks from the pass from Ellis and now we're just outside the French 22. It's all gone a bit scrappy and it's turnover ball.

12 mins: England have it again in the centre of the field on halfway. England are recycling it but achieving very little. Mike Catt fumbles but it's no knock on, thankfully. Don't want him booed again. I don't know where from, but France have made the break (the Beeb were showing a replay) and now France are on the England line... but they've knocked it on and Palmer taps it down for England to stop the madness. What happened there?

14 mins: Touch judge wants a word. Corry was a bit mad with the boot but the French guy was on the wrong side of the ruck. France have the penalty, which is fine for England who were close to conceding the try.

*** ENGLAND 3 FRANCE 6 ***

15 mins: Knock on at the restart. Lineout England throw in from the French free kick.

16 mins: England take the lineout and try and maul it. They're driving really nicely here. Still moving forward, but then they release it to Mike Catt who chips for Strettle but the ball beats him. France lineout.

17 mins: Missed a minute as the Beeb were showing a replay and I was hitting update. Strettle makes a nice break for England and now England are just out of the French 22 and now it's been knocked on.

18 mins: France scrum. Go on, Harry, mess with Yachvili again. The scrum is reset. That probably went down because the French were cheating (ahem). Yachvili feeds Skrela who kicks for touch. Lewsey gathers and takes it quickly but throws a HORRIBLE long pass which France intercept but they mess it up. Jesus, wake up Josh!

20 mins: Over to my Irish husband Paul who is actually hoping for an England success here, for the first time ever.

21 mins:  Some silliness on thr ground hands France a penalty, which is - believe it or not - safely converted by Skrela.

***ENGLAND 3 FRANCE 9***

23 mins:  And in a spirit of reciprocity, France offend right back after an England break is slowed, giving Toby Flood a shot at narrowing the gap.  Which he spurns horribly. 

26 mins:  A fine break by Harry Ellis, who's very good at such things, but then sloppy handling from the English hands France a chance to get out of jail.  For dear's sake, I've spent more than 20 years wanting England to lose and they've won, more often than not.  You'd think they could give me a win today...

28 mins:  David Strettle, an England international for just 100 minutes, really looks to the manor born.  He's running at the French, and although no-one can really make it into what it deserves, France infringe (offside)  Toby Flood accepts the points.

***ENGLAND 6 FRANCE 9***

32 mins:  Bloody hell.  Now Chuter goes offside.  England are having their moments, but infringements and slack handling (I'm looking at you, Mike Tindall) are stopping them from building anything.  Skrela isn't fit to kick this, so it's Yachvili instead.  The result is no different.

***ENGLAND 6 FRANCE 12***

34 mins:  From the restart, Tindall absolutely SMACKS Chabal, who then holds on and gives a penalty away.  Flood kicks it safely.

***ENGLAND 9 FRANCE 12***

35 mins:  Much though it would help Ireland for them to win, I must go on record saying how hard it is to cheer a team containing Joe Worsley.

38 mins:  Another penalty  for England, another miss for Flood.  In his defence, it was a long one.

40 mins:  Well, after taking a pretty heavy tackle, Catt managed a very creditable kick downfield, and then very little else happened.  Half time, three points in it.  Could be worse, now England need to concentrate and try and get something out of the second half.  For their own good, of course, I'm not speaking from a selfish Irish point of view.  Not at all.

And so it's half time.  A new post to be opened up for the second half, which I suspect will not be without tries.  This is a pretty open game, but the handling and execution have just been a little bit off.