Scrumbag

What do you think of The BBC's new Six Nations trailer?

I'd best describe it as... expensive, predictable and a bit daft (Chabal's diving around despite the fact France have dumped him). However, I'd love to know what you think about the trail which will be rammed down every rugby fans throat from this week onwards. Does it get you all excited or make you want to take up snooker?

Rugby's "Mankini" row rumbles on, as fans threaten boycott over ban on giant Borat thongs...

Earlier in the week Scrumbag was among the very first people to bring you the startling news that New Zealand's rugby bigwigs have banned fans from wearing Borat style lime green mankinis to rugby matches. I found this quite shocking news, and so I'm not at all surprised that the Kiwi mankini massive are protesting this outrageous ban, and even contemplating boycotting future games.

"The crackdown on skimpy costumes is an insult to everyone that goes to the sevens. This is what the sevens are all about: Rugby and having a good time," wrote "A Maloney" on the forum for All Blacks news, Stuff.co.nz. "As long as the important bits are covered what's the problem," he continued whilst grooming his moustache. "I can legally walk down the street wearing the mankini and I can go to the beach wearing my mankini but I can't go to the sevens wearing my mankini, yet these places are family orientated public places. Get the prude out of the sevens executive".

Eek. So let me know what you think about the Borat ban. Will you be wearing your mankini to the Six Nations?

Don't drink and cook during the Six Nations

Heading into the kitchen when "tightly slipsy" after watching your country lose to France is a terrible, terrible idea. Not only do you end up cooking burnt baked beans on frozen pizza, chance are you'll also burn your house down. Hence a Wales-wide publicity campaign has been launched today to highlight the dangers of cooking after drinking alcohol during the Six Nations Rugby Championship. Odd, but let's go with it...

The month-long publicity drive will include Fire Flash television advertising and a Bluetooth marketing campaign in Cardiff City Centre on 9 February before, during and after Wales’s first home game, targeting the thousands of rugby fans who flock to the capital, many of whom will enjoy a few drinks, before going home and drunkenly cooking leeks etc. The Bluetooth marketing team will also be distributing scratch-cards for a competition to win tickets to the Wales v France Six Nations rugby match.

Miss England shows her love for England's deaf rugby side

Ah, Miss England, how I love it when you smile in your sash, and say things about world peace, etc, etc. And my love for the lovely Miss England has doubled today with the news that she in turn loves England's Deaf rugby squad. She's getting behind the team for their big match against Wales at Broadstreet RFC, near Coventry, on Sunday.

Georgia Horsley, who represented England at the Miss World event last month and has a hearing impairment herself, is a lifelong rugby fan who will be attending the game against Wales, the deaf rugby world champions. She will present the England lads with their caps and also the trophy to the winning captain. Bless.

The South Wales Echo wants women banned from watching rugby...

"An international is no place for a woman." Certainly not our borderline insane words there, but the words of Dan O'Neill at The South Wales Echo. Click here to read their frankly bonkers article straight out of 1954 which suggests women should not watch rugby. I'm sure, well I hope, it's fairly tongue in cheek, but if you're easily offended and don't want to read it, here's the gist in five points...

1) Women used to have to clean dishes to get tickets

2) Paul Daniels is a great man

3) Women are often fat

4) Women are often stupid

5) Women should not watch rugby.

Scrumbag of course does not agree with any of this, and I know there's loads of female rugby fans who read Scrumbag who know a great more about the game than the writer of this piece. Please let me know what you've thought of it...

Is England's James Haskell about to become an Ultimate Fighter?

England flanker James Haskell has revealed he has been engaging in gruelling Ultimate Fighting Championship-style training to hone his rugby skills. Gggggrrrr. Talking in The Telegraph today, Haskell, who will feature in England's back row for the Six Nations opener against Wales on Feb 2, believes many of the skills are transferable to the rugby pitch. Skills like punching people in the face.

"I don't want to suddenly change career - doing mixed martial arts is just to add another element to my rugby," he said whilst writhing into his Lycra jumpsuit and preparing to kick somebody in the face. "There are similarities between wrestling and rugby and it's obvious how one can help the other. They're both about controlling your own body weight and using your opponent's body weight to your advantage."

"If a player is running at you, you can use his weight to pivot, put him down and get straight back on your feet to steal the ball. It changes how your body works because in rugby you can end up being one dimensional. Wrestling is good but I really like the boxing, especially the technical aspect in how to throw a punch correctly. Initially I thought it was odd because one minute you're beating each other up and the next you're shaking each other's hands. But that's just like rugby."

Expect fireworks (and eye gouging) at the Six Nations then...

Will "chunkiness" be the key to Vainikolo's England success?

Great things come in chunky packages. Hummers, Real McCoy crisps, that Scottish Widow lady from that Place In The Sun show - all chunky / all great. And it seems chunkiness might be the key to England's newest star's success.

According to prop legend Jason Leonard, Vainikolo's bulk will be the key to him becoming an England hero following his switch from rugby league.

He said to The Sun, "I think's it's fantastic Vainikolo is in the squad. Out of our rugby league converts it has been a bit 50-50. Some have been great and some haven't. The advantage he has over the others though is pretty obvious — an extra two stones! From what I've seen at Gloucester, he looks a great player.

And Leonard doesn't even care that the chunky Volcano (chunkano? No...) isn't even English. "OK, he wasn't born in England," he chirped, whilst polishing his big shiny face, "but when the anthem is being sung, I don't see it being weird. He qualifies through residency and he's stated that this is the country he wants to play for, so as far I'm concerned he's OK by me."

Brilliant. But is it okay by you too? Should yet another rugby league player be getting a shot for England? Should someone from overseas be getting a shot? As ever, let me know with your comments...

5 things to know about England new boy Luke Narraway

1) He's set to make a shock debut in a new-look England side in Saturday's Six Nations opener against Wales at Twickenham.

2) The former Under-21 international now takes the place at No 8 of Hareqluins's Nick Easter, out with a right knee injury.

3) He's versatile. "Luke Narraway has played good rugby at both 8 and 6," says 98 year old England gaffer Ashton.

4) Ashton's picked him, without actually seeing him. "I am more than happy to put him in there," chirped the 111 year old. "He's a good footballing player, and the Gloucester guys tell me he's tough." The Gloucester guys? Surely you should know this for yourself?

5) Even Narraway doesn't think he should be playing for England. "It was a total shock when I saw my name on the team sheet this morning," chirped Luke. "I wasn't expecting it. I had to pinch myself but I realise now I have a job to do on Saturday."

Further proof Borat mankinis and rugby can mix

Earlier we published outrage that the Kiwi authorities plan to ban Borat style mankinis from rugby matches.

I think now I know why. Here's frankly dazzling footage of a French man taunting the Kiwis in a fine Borat mankini example. It was filmed outside the Millenium stadium just before France Vs All Blacks in the Rugby World Cup Quarter Final.

Rugby League cracks America, should Union follow?

Football has been trying to break America longer than Oasis. But now it seems Rugby League are trying too, and its going down quite well. So should Union follow?

A fat 12,000 people have turned out to watch Leed Rhinos battle Australia's South Sydney Rabbitohs at Hodges Stadium in Jacksonville, Florida on Saturday.

The Leeds team took the lead early, but the Rabittohs (what the hell is a Rabittoh?) staged a dramatic second half comeback which very nearly saw them snatch victory. However it was the Rhinos that ran out winners, clinching the win

The Aussie coach, who oddly is employed by Russell Crowe chirped, "The best results seemed to be off the field. Over 12,000 people came out to watch when it's raining, the merchandise all sold out and the number of new Souths supporters in the U.S. is phenomenal. I think we have helped promote the game over here over the past ten days and we look forward to getting that opportunity again."

So the event seems to have been a success, so surely a top British Union side should go out too? Let me know what you think...