Scrumbag

You've still got time to win a cushy job at the home of Scrumbag

The minutes are ticking away, but there's still enough time for you to win a chance to come and work for Shiny Media (home of Scrumbag, Who Ate All The Pies, and a host of other brilliant blogs). Our LG Video Media Talent compo has been extended until Tuesday 1st January 2008, so there's still a chance to win an internship with us at Shiny Media.

We’re looking for new talent in front of and behind the camera and all you have to do is send in your own video presentation or edit some of our raw footage. Three people will be shortlisted from each category, and these six brilliant people will need to be able to attend a judging date on week commencing 14th January at the Shiny Media office. Here's the kind of thing you need to do...

The standard of entries so far has been very high so far, so good luck.Click here to find out how to enter

Scrumbag shit lookalikes: Kieran Roche's injured eye and Zippy from Rainbow

I'm sure Perry Freshwater wasn't thinking "I'll make Kieran's eye look like the fly mouthed alien from 1980s kids TV when he viciously pummeled it with his elbow, but somehow, he did...

Jason Leonard secures cushy England job...

England's record cap holder, ballet fan, and proud owner of the world's fattest neck, Jason Leonard will take a role in running the elite game next year. Leonard, who won 114 England caps, has been appointed to the Professional Game Board (PGB) which will oversee elite rugby in England from July 2008. This basically means he'll sit in meetings and talk a lot of hot air over a selection of curling sandwiches delivered from Pret a Manger.

"I hope to bring my experience to the meetings which aim to make the elite game as good as it can be," Jason said rubbing his hands with glee.

Brian Ashton plans to get drunk with Fabio Capello

According to The Sun today, not only does Nikaala from Croydon want "world peace and a puppy for Xmas", new (and old) England boss Brian Ashton wants to crack a bottle of Chianti with new England football boss Fabio Capello. Ashton had planned a January meeting with Steve McClaren but now Italian-speaking Ashton hopes to keep the appointment with his successor.

Ashton said: “It was agreed back before the World Cup that I was going to meet up with Steve to discuss many aspects of our national roles. Now that he’s no longer in the job, I’m hoping the same meeting will go ahead with Mr Capello. It’ll be the first time in English sporting history that the rugby and football bosses will be able to converse in Italian. That should make him feel at home.”

Ashton is fluent in Italian having spent part of his playing career as a scrum-half in Italy. Ole! Oh, wait, no, that's Spanish...

Poll of the day: Did England get the Brian Ashton decision right?

At long, long, long last Rob Andrew has finally earned his £8945858095 wage and made a decision about poor Brian Ashton's career.

We all know what happened, but have they got it right? Mike Catt please note, you can only vote "no" once.

"Baby eater" Sebastian Chabal hates the French...

As 2007 grinds to an end, my favourite story of the year, had to be The Sun's scoop that Chabal eats babies. However, they've found another great Chabal story today - apparently the garlic chomping beast hates the French.

Rumour has it that Sale's Chabal turned down a host of massive offers to return to France, because he hates French people mobbing him in the street. He would rather play for less cash in Stockport than deal with all those screaming Frenchies in Biarritz. Zut alors, etc.

Odd story of the day: Russell Crowe wants to ban fruit machines from rugby clubs

Oscar-winning actor Russell Crowe might love rugby (and beating people over the head with telephones) but he hates fruit machines. Odd. Apparently Crowe who owns 75% of his local rugby league team South Sydney, has already had the sparkly machines removed from his club, and now wants rid of them from every single rugby club... in the world.

"We are not moralising here," Crowe has told Australian reporter, "we just believe that low-income areas need less machines."

Another innovation Crowe has introduced since taking over at his rugby club is banning cheerleaders and replacing them with big fat men with drums. Now that I can almost understand. Almost.

Olly Barkley charged by police for ruining a wedding...

What's wrong with egg chasers at the moment. First Gavin Henson broke a train, then some bloke got slap happy with a matchday programme, and now the usually well behaved Mr Barkley has got himself in a spot of bother.

According to The Press Association, England's fly-half Olly Barkley has been charged with assault following an alleged brawl at a wedding.

The 26-year-old Bath player is alleged to have attacked a fellow guest at a lavish reception at Stowe School in Buckinghamshire. Hang on. Who gets married in a school? Olly, you were right to smash the place up (allegedly smash the place up).

Scrumbag shit lookalikes: Kieran Roche's injured eye and the alien from the 1980's Smash ads

I'm sure Perry Freshwater wasn't thinking "I'll make Kieran's eye look like the alien from the 1980's Smash ads" when he viciously pummeled it with his elbow, but somehow, he did...

Balls to Iraq - the RAF fly to the Caribbean to save Jamaican rugby

We might be at war in at least two countries, but The Royal Air Force will be flying into Jamaica on a 10-day tour in January to get kids playing rugger.

According to my favourite ever newspaper The Jamaica Gleaner, The Jamaican Rugby League Association (JRLA) will be hosting the RAF for this ground-breaking tour to Jamaica, renowned for its depth of sporting talent, but very new to the sport of egg chasing.

Rugger fan, Wing Commander Dean Andrew, said: "We were inspired by the infectious enthusiasm of the JRLA, and the RAF wanted to play a part in supporting the JDF community relations programme by engaging underprivileged youngsters in rugby league and discouraging them from drugs and crime." Presumably he said this whilst shopping for swimming trunks and suntan lotion...